On the home page I mentioned the need to take your time to find the right counsellor. Looking through the BACP (British Association of Counsellors and Psychotherapists) website and listings, and Counselling Directory can help you find the one that is going to be right for you. Counselling should be a team effort - you and your counsellor working together, so the relationship that you build is (in my opinion) the most important part of the process. The aim of counselling is for you to be in an environment where you can openly and safely express your deepest thoughts and feelings. You should never feel judged or that you are not in control of what you talk about. Counselling is not about the counsellor and what they think should happen, it is about you and your needs. For you to feel heard, and validated. For you to be able to open up about things that you have not previously discussed, difficult stuff that you know you need to explore even though it is hard to do so.
The right counsellor will know how tough this is, and so should ensure it is done gently and at your pace. It is usually tiring, and can leave you feeling upset as you begin to process all the stuff you have carrying around so it is esspecially important to take extra care of yourself as you go through the process. It should also result in you starting to feel lighter as you begin to understand yourself and others, and the bigger picture starts to become clearer. Counselling can be tough, but it can be life changing with the right person so please take the time to find the right person. It is well worth the investment.